Club Guidelines

In case your campus is entirely abstinent, there is no need to establish a club. Feel free to stop reading at this point.

With that having been said, know that there's one way to guarantee that your school will never form a chastity club: read this document, and then hope someone else will do the work.

One saint said that the unmistakable mark of a true apostle is having zeal for souls, so I hope that you do not delay in setting out to do this work. One girl said after hearing a talk on chastity, "I agree with everything you say. I know most of my friends would, too. It all makes so much sense. It's just that no one else I know is actually doing it. I don't know if I'm strong enough to be the first one. Maybe if a group of us all started together."

This is your job: to create a culture in which it is easy to be good, a climate favorable to purity. In the words of St. Catherine of Sienna, "If you are what you should be, you will set the world on fire."

So if you feel the call to put out your nets "into the deep" as Christ said, then here's how to do it.

How to set up a club:

If the desire is on your heart to set up a Pure Love Club (PLC) first take this to prayer and ask for God's guidance and support.
Find an advisor for the club. A solid priest, deacon, nun, religion teacher, or campus minister is ideal, and he or she can help provide some advice for your projects. Let the person know that the time commitments for him or her will be minimal, and that you're just looking for someone to provide occasional input, motivation, and prayer support. If you get a deacon or priest, he may be able to offer a Mass or Communion service from time to time for the PLC.
Find some friends who are interested in helping, and then advertise the creation of the PLC. If you're in High School, announce the meeting over the P.A. and place ads around campus. If you're in college, place ads for your first meeting in the church if your college is Catholic, or in the Newman center if you have one. Feel free to use (with permission) any place where college flyers are placed, or write an ad or article in the school newspaper. If there is a college Mass, perhaps you can make an announcement during it.

High school and college life tends to be filled with commitments and activities, so do not be discouraged if the club needs to start small. It is better to have five solid members who understand the urgency of promoting purity than fifty members who join for superficial reasons. You're not trying to win a popularity contest, so do not be concerned with numbers. The level of interest will probably be the opposite of the level of need. In other words, regardless of how many people show up, there is still a tremendous need for the work of the club. After all, it's not an abstinence bereavement group. It is an apostolate.

How the club works:

What are the objectives of a Pure Love Club (PLC)?

The mission of the PLC is to create a sexual revolution of purity. To do this, the club has three goals:
- Apostolic work: Spreading the message of chastity through prayer, personal example, and projects.
- Formation: Learning solid reasons for living a pure life, and deepening one's spirituality.
- Support: Friendship in the pursuit of purity.
Can the PLC be affiliated with an existing school organization or club?
Yes. Should a campus already have a similar club and not have the resources to start up a new one, you can often join the PLC to their efforts (if they wish). Affiliating the PLC with another faith-based club on campus, such as a Pro-Life Club, Campus Ministry Club, FCA, SADD, etc is perfectly acceptable. We don't care who gets the credit, as long as the work gets done.
How often is the PLC required to meet?
This is for each club to decide. Some clubs find it helpful to meet monthly, while others prefer bi-weekly or weekly meetings.
What qualifications must a student meet in order to be a member of the PLC?
Each member should maintain a chaste lifestyle, and attend the meetings.
What are the different offices within the PLC?
- The Advisor is an adult who will oversee the club, as mentioned above.
- The President will direct each meeting, and guide the club to accomplish their projects.
- The Vice-President will stand in place of the President when he/she is absent, and assist the President in all club activities. The VP will also keep track of any funds obtained though fundraising, donations, etc.
What will the meetings consist of?
The first meeting should include an explanation of the PLC's mission and purpose. All meetings should begin and end with prayer, and it is preferable that the advisor be present at this first meeting, to share a few words of encouragement. The leader of the club shouldl give an example of some of the projects that can be accomplished, and brainstorm with the club as to which ones sound best. Before ending, schedule the next meeting and get the contact info for each student.
Each meeting should include:
1. Prayer: A decade of the Rosary in the chapel is ideal. Offer whatever petitions you wish, but make sure to pray for all the students on your campus (and for all Pure Love Clubs). If Eucharistic adoration is available, make use of this as often as possible.
2. Formation: Promote chastity within the club. To do this, some clubs may wish to discuss one chapter from the Pure Love, Pure Womanhood, or Pure Manhood booklets at each meeting. A person could give his or her testimony, the life of a saint could be presented, a video could be watched and discussed, a bible passage could be discussed, the group could discuss a subject (ie: strategies for a pure life, how to set standards, the lies of the media, refusal skills, etc.), or you can break info male/female groups in order to address specific issues and have accountability partners. A partner is someone who knows your weaknesses, will specifically pray for you, and will help you stay strong. Partners should not be co-ed. If you establish a Pure Love Club on your campus, contact us at 2020 Gillespie Way, El Cajon, CA 92020, and we'll send you a free DVD set of Jason and Crystalina's TV series, The Pure Life, to use during your meetings.
3. Apostolic work: Decide which project will be accomplished this month. If certain members wish to speak on chastity, they can break off and talk about how they will go about this.
How does one join the PLC?
Those who wish to join should begin attending the club meetings. At the beginning of each semester there can be a commitment ceremony, where following a meeting or Mass at school, the advisor could lead the students in an explanation, and prayer, followed by a time of signing the commitment card. All students are given a copy of Pure Love, if they do not already own one.
What are some project ideas for the PLC?
The goal of the PLC each year is simple: reach every single person on your campus with the message of chastity. To do this, we suggest the following list of project ideas. Feel free to use them, or come up with others on your own. If you come up with any new ideas, feel free to email them to us, so we can post them for other clubs to use. All that is necessary is that the focus of the projects must always conform to Church teaching on human sexuality. If you go to a state university, not everything you do has to specifically promote Catholicism. Since many of the students in need of a chastity message are non-Catholic, we must reach them as well. For them, Pure Love Club has various secular materials, such as Pure Love, Pure Womanhood, commitment cards, and a web site.
In order to do certain projects, it helps to have some money. So, you should do an activity or two to raise funds for your club for the semester. See Question 9 for how to do this. Should you do a public fundraising event, such as a car wash, make sure that you have materials on hand (posters, flyers, etc . . .) so that the customers will know where their money is going, and where they can send more, if they wish. Once you have some funds, here are some ideas:
- Youth outreach: Make arrangements for certain members of the PLC to visit a youth group, Jr. High, or High school religion class to speak to the students about the benefits of a chaste lifestyle. It is especially effective when college students speak in high schools classes, when upperclassmen speak to freshmen and sophomores, or any high school student speaks to a junior high. These speakers could practice their talks in front of the PLC. The advisor may be able to assist you in getting permission from the teachers or youth ministers to speak to their teens. Click here for tips of giving a chastity talk, and here for tips on becoming a chastity speaker.
- Safe sex is a joke month: Use some of your funds to promote awareness of the STD problem and the ineffectiveness of condoms. Place flyers in halls, bulletin boards, bathrooms, classrooms, etc. See Question 10 for where to obtain these materials. Have your advisor approve the materials before posting them anywhere.
- Bless the girls: A good way to kick off any semester is for the guys in the club to raise enough money to buy a white rose for every girl on campus (High school) or several hundred girls (college). The young men then write "You're worth waiting for" on a ribbon tied to the rose. In order to get these roses to the young women, the members of the club can get faculty permission to stay late after school, or to come before anyone else, and tape each rose to each girl's locker. In college, you may be able to put them in mailboxes, on dorm room doors, etc. You may want to write "pureloveclub.com" on the back of the ribbons, so the girls know where to go to live out this lifestyle.
- Adopt a Mission: While Pure Love Clubs focus on spreading the message of chastity to their local communities, they also have the opportunity to support international missionaries. PLC currently funds the distribution of chastity materials to missions in Ghana, Ethiopia, Nigeria, Zambia, Tijuana, Miacatlan, Mexico City, Trinidad, Belize, Guatemala, Medellin, Bogota, Canada, Australia, and England. If your club would like to adopt any one of the above missionary locations, here's what to do: As a group, select one of the places. Then, raise funds for a mailing to them. You can do this with a car wash, personal donations, taking a collection at school or church (if approved by the principal or pastor), etc. Then, have your club faculty sponsor call 619-387-7200, and ask for Jason, who will ship the materials to the mission on your behalf. Whoever receives the materials will be asked to mail you pictures of the teens using your gifts, so that the students in your PLC will see the immediate impact of your generosity. This can also establish a pen-pal relationship between international Pure Love Clubs.
- Pure Prom: As prom approaches, members could pass out tracts on chastity, letters from future wife/husband, or make creative abstinence posters to place in the hallways. Also, talk with the administration at your school about dress codes at the dance, and playing decent music. Perhaps by having theme dance (70's, 80's, etc.), the dance will be more laid back, and will have less bumping and grinding.
- Public Awareness: Buy a billboard near campus, and use it to promote chastity. You can come up with a creative slogan, and point people to pureloveclub.com as a resource for more information. If a billboard is too expensive, then make or buy posters around campus. Members can create creative slogans such as:
  - "I'm not playing hard to get . . . I am hard to get."
  - "Prom dress . . . $250, Hair and nails . . . $90, Limo 150$. Saving yourself for marriage . . . priceless. There are some things money can't buy."
  - "Marry me first"
  - "I'm worth waiting for."
- Media awareness: Invite the media if you are doing a significant project, because local television news stations and newspapers are eager for new stories to cover. This will serve to raise local awareness of the spreading movement towards abstinence. Like any other PLC project, ones that may attract media attention for the school should first receive approval from your school administration. Also, write letters, articles, or editorials to the local and school newspaper to raise public awareness of STDs, abstinence, or any other suitable topic. If you're in college, you could produce your own newsletter or newspaper to challenge the sexual ethic on campus. If anyone in the club has experience designing a web site, you can put one up and advertise it. See how many hits you get, and have members write their testimonies on the site. Provide links to great chastity sites. Instead of blaming the media for corrupting the youth, use the media to spread the chastity message.
- Teacher outreach: If you go to a Catholic school, promote a chastity video or books for the appropriate teacher to consider showing the students. Perhaps you can pass it on to the speech or debate teacher to get the students involved in a discussion on the subject. If there's a health teacher that deals with sexuality issues bring to his or her attention such resources as The Medical Institute for Sexual Health or One More Soul. Also, encourage them to implement a solid chastity curriculum, like Theology of the Body for Teens. Who knows? They might use some of these resources for years to come.

Guest Speaker: If your club is at a high school, arrange for a mandatory, all-school assembly. If your club is on a college, you'll have more of a challenge. This is because attendance for lectures is usually optional on universities. So, you need to get a bit creative with how you market the program. For example:

First, talk with debate, speech, or religion professors to see if they are willing to offer their students extra credit for attending or writing a response paper on it.

Second, smother the campus with advertisements of the talk. But do not say, "Come to an abstinence talk Thursday night at 7:00!" I'm an abstinence speaker, and I wouldn't even want to come. Nobody thinks they need abstinence because abstinence is just the absence of sex. People who are abstinent presumably think they're fine, and those who are sexually active will not give up their free time to hear someone that they imagine will only make them feel guilty. So, you need to offer them something they want, not something you're going to take away from them. To do this, get creative with your ads:

You could put posters up in the girl's dorms that say, "Hanging out, hooking up, and hoping for Mr. Right? If you're ready for a new approach and want to know where the decent guys have gone, come to " Or, put posters on "How to have romance without regret," "The Pill and the Shot: Find out what Planned Parenthood isn't telling you," or ""How come he got the benefits and I didn't even get a friend?"

In a guy's dorm, put posters that say, "What the condom companies don't want you to know." Or, come up with other intriguing ways to piqué their interest.

Other posters could have a collage of words, like "Friends with benefits?" and "Hooking up?" and other key words that define the current confusion when it comes to dating in college. Then you could have some catch line, like "Looking for a better way to find romance without regret? Come to ..."

Other posters could say, "Why have most college students never heard of the most common STD? (Here's a hint: it takes the lives of 288,000 women each year and it's not AIDS). Come find out what the condom companies don't want you to know?"

Another idea is "How to shoot your future marriage in the head. Come to ___ for details."

Or, pick some of these ideas, add your own, put it on a flyer, and stick it under all the doors in a dorm room or frat/sorority house.

Thirdly, and even better, arrange with the school to bring in a relationships (ie: chastity) speaker as part of freshman orientation. They often give the new students talks on date rape, drinking, dorm life, etc. So, try to get then to agree that the students need this just as much--or more. This will guarantee a mandatory audience, so you will be able to reach students who would otherwise never come to a chastity talk. Your PLC's advisor may be able to work with the administration to bring in guest speakers or arrange such events.

 Lunchtime Holy Hours: The three objectives of the PLC are: apostolic work, formation, and support. All of these are achieved at once if you can work with a priest to set up Eucharistic Adoration at lunchtime on your campus. Here's why:

1. Missionary work: Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament is not only the source of all grace we need to be pure, he is the destination to which all of our missionary work is directed. That's why Pope John Paul II said that we should "consider the Eucharist as the heart and soul of the missionary activity." By making adoration available to your classmates, you are doing the greatest missionary work on earth. I truly believe that your apostolic work will succeed to the extent that you make your club intensely Eucharistic. Christ is the vine and you are the branches. Without him, you can do nothing. Therefore, spending time before the Blessed Sacrament in reparation for all our sins and in intercession for your campus is more important than anything else.

2. Formation: By spending time in silence before the Blessed Sacrament, you are allowing Christ to form you. He must increase, we must decrease (John 3:30). In the words of Pope John Paul II, "We must understand that in order 'to do', we must first learn 'to be', that is to say, in the sweet company of Jesus in adoration."

3. Support: Especially in the presence of the Blessed Sacrament, you have the support of all of heaven, including the angels and saints. Any revolution for chastity in the world will only come through a revolution of Eucharistic devotion, especially among the youth. So, the more we can center all of our ministries around the Blessed Sacrament, the more they will flourish. How else could we hope to lead people to sustain their purity?

Consider what daily adoration did for Mother Teresa's work:

"It was not until 1973, when we began our daily Holy Hour that our community started to grow and blossom... In our congregation, we used to have adoration once a week for one hour, and then in 1973, we decided to have adoration one hour every day. We have much work to do. Our homes for the sick and dying destitute are full everywhere. And from the time we started having adoration every day, our love for Jesus became more intimate, our love for each other more understanding, our love for the poor more compassionate, and we have double the number of vocations. God has blessed us with many wonderful vocations. The time we spend in having our daily audience with God is the most precious part of the whole day."
In order to set up adoration for your campus, you need to speak with a priest or deacon. One high school chaplain, Fr. Jim Shea, arranged for daily lunchtime adoration in this way: "I have a troupe of 30 assistant chaplains from the senior class, and they are paired up and each pair takes a week at a time to lead prayer in the school. They open and close the chapel and lead morning prayer. At lunch they are the sentinels for adoration. We expose the Blessed Sacrament at the beginning of lunch with the normal exposition hymn O Salutaris and some incense. Then there is silence for a few minutes before some quiet sacred music is played in the background. Adoration continues for about 20 minutes or so, and then there is the Tantum Ergo, incense, the divine praises, benediction, and reposition. When a priest is not available, no benediction takes place. An extraordinary minister of the Eucharist is always one of the two adorers. It's a beautiful thing and has made a huge difference in our school. If you are interested in setting this up at your school feel free to email me at frjshea@bismarckdiocese.com."

9. How does the PLC raise funds for the club's activities?
Clubs can do any number of activities to raise money to accomplish its goals. The National Abstinence Clearinghouse recommends some of the following fundraising ideas to bring abstinence-until-marriage presentations to your community.

1. There is $4.00 per student available through the federal government Drug Free Schools Program on a yearly basis. These monies can be received through your state department of education. Check with your department to see when these funds must be requested. In many states, there are also drug, tobacco, and alcohol monies available on a yearly basis through your state department of education or your department of drug abuse prevention. Both of these monies often have to be requested in the summer preceding the following school year by written request through the school superintendent.

2. Each school has student activities funds that may be available for this purpose.

3. Churches are very interested in prevention efforts, but often do not have programs of their own in place. They are usually interested in helping in any way they can. You may also see if your pastor from church is willing to allow you to speak after Mass and take up a collection.

4. Service organizations such as the Lion's Clubs, Knights of Columbus, and Rotary are usually interested in helping with prevention efforts in their community.

5. Occasionally there are private benefactors who have a great interest in prevention efforts and are willing to make a contribution to your efforts.

6. There are countless other way that a club can raise their own money, such as by doing car washes, making personal donations, etc. In order to keep track of these funds, the Vice President of each club serves as the treasury.

10. Where do we obtain resources on chastity and STDs to distribute on campus?
There are several great web sites where you can order info on chastity and STD's. For starters:

Letters to future wife/husband:
Sample Letters 1, 2, 3.

Lovematters.com newspaper: 1-800-858-3040.

Commitment cards: 1-888-291-8000

Chasity books: 1-888-291-8000

Info, videos, posters, brochures, etc. on STDs and abstinence:
The Medical Institute for Sexual Health
Abstinence Clearinghouse
Project Reality
Friends First

If you have any questions, please feel free to call us at 619-387-7200.